the ugly truth. sucks.

I understand now why moms don't go out of the house not looking put together. And the moms that do go out of the house looking like you-know-what you kinda look at them with your head cocked to the side and ask what on God's green earth happened to them? Well, that's what I thought when I saw them. I swore up and down I wouldn't be either type of those moms. I wouldn't be the one that had to be all done up but I for sure wouldn't look like a walking zombie. I am a walking contradictory. Not only did people come to my house today while I wore sweats and sported a spit up stained shirt, all I could think about is: must. hide. the raccoon eyes. I've never been one to wear make up on a consistent basis. I don't think I ever really needed it. Until now. I was hoping that I was going to be able to find some common ground between looking all done up and looking like death....like this cool, hip, "I make this look easy" being a mom deal. yeah right. But now, I'm not so sure. My insides are tired. freakishly tired. So to even think about hiding this tiredness with foundation and mascara seems absurd. Did I mention I don't have any summer clothes? And shopping for clothes....not something I want to do, but I think I kinda have to. I can't live in sweats forever. The ugly truth is that no one told me that I wasn't going to magically fit back into my clothes. Oh, my poor clothes. I haven't seen my clothes for 10 months now. Who knew I would be so attached to clothes. I'm not that type of person....but when you take so much away from a girl-physically.....oh you get the picture. hopefully. I no longer wonder what's wrong with those moms who look like you-know-what. I empathize with them now. Note to self: don't judge a mommy who looks like a train ran over them. Because, well, you've become one yourself.